Battle Beyond Mars is an awful, no-budget, low-effort movie. It’s poorly edited, uninspired, and features some of the worst acting I’ve ever seen in any film. I love it.
Taking place in 2227, Battle Beyond Mars shows us a world in which we have taken control of Mars to use it as a military base and defend Earth. Just three minutes into the movie, we find out that the base has been infested by spider-like creatures, and everyone at the base is dead.
The commander (Tim Hatch) has to bring back some of the slime left by the spiders for the professor (Jeff Kirkendall) to examine, while robot M38 (Anthony Polonia) and Vann (Mark Polonia) have to work to try to figure out what happened to the Mars base and everyone there.
Director Mark Polonia is known for his no-budget films, releasing 11 last year, where he is often seen starring as well. He has a somewhat cult following, which I discovered after watching this film, and it’s clear why. His movies are hilarious, and there is no shortage of films for viewers, with this being his 96th film.
While this was supposed to take place on Mars, the scenes obviously take place in some kind of podcast or music recording studio.
The CGI throughout this movie is exactly what you would expect from a no-budget production and certainly adds to the hilarity of this movie.
The inclusion of a scene at a strip club was fascinating to me. We see a woman dancing on a pole juxtaposed with clips of scientists trying to crack codes and discussing what should be done to try to solve this Mars mystery. I believe this is a commentary on social and political awareness made to call out those who choose to avoid important events in the world around them.
Stock footage is often reused as well, and it’s just as hilarious the 8th time seeing the same alien scene.
One scene I really enjoyed is when the planet got impacted and there was an Earthquake of sorts, where we see some phenomenal acting as the professor “falls” out of his chair, leaping to the side. I love how eager and emotional his acting was, really committing to his role. He was by far the most passionate about his role out of the cast.
The costume design was also an interesting choice, specifically for M38. The entire movie, he’s outfitted in regular human attire with a mask that is meant to signify him being a robot. In many scenes, you can see the cameraman in the reflection of this mask, adding to the comedy as there is just a man standing.
The dialogue in this movie is so soulless from most characters. There is zero emotion felt in any lines. The delivery of the news that people are dead is so deadpan that it feels like everyone doesn’t know what they’re saying, just that they have to say it.
This is a great watch if you’re looking for a laugh with your friends next movie night.
